Are you my Mr. E?

i thought things were going okay with you and me? but what happened? all of a sudden you dropped out of my life, but you come back every once in a blue moon just to keep me attached. And I hate the way you act like this was all nothing to you. I dropped all of my pride wishing you could do the same, wishing that you could talk to me the way i talk to you, without regard of how you might think, firmly believing that the truth will always set you free.. free from pain and misunderstandings. but what’s this i feel? discontent. confusion. hatred for myself for being the way i am. there must be something wrong with me, the way i handle relationships. i can kick myself in the face for blundering up so much! i really can see you as someone i could live the rest of my life for. i know what you’re thinking, it’s always easy to say that about people that we’re currently admiring or currently with, but i say it just the same because that’s how i feel.. if i had my way i’d wish everyone deal with me the way i do with them.. be honest about everything, be frank about everything.. then everyone would include you, and you would tell me why it can’t work with you and me, why you’re afraid of getting into something with me, why you won’t take the risk, what hurt you so much before, so i could answer all that.. and if it’s something about the way i am, maybe it’s something i can change? or maybe it’s something misunderstood? please tell me, i really want to fix this.. if you only knew how much we could become, i wonder if you’d change your mind about things.